We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Where I Sleep at Your Door

by Jon Hughes

I dressed you in flames, Ashes in your mouth; You burn my eyes, my body, But my head is full of clouds and rain. I dreamt up a wave To sweep us from these shores; Like crumbled shells we'd surface And the pain would drift silently away. I'd swim for miles but every time I'd breathe I'd know I could feel you drown. My best escape is everywhere I run I feel that you run me down. I followed you first I was so inclined To be your steel-eyed savior But I was only hunger and thirst. I followed the song; Listened for the notes Of love that runs with reason But my mind was made up wrong. My best mistake was to everyone I turned I took it they'd turn me down. You took my word but everything I said Was spoken to hear the sound. I turned away now everywhere I turn I feel that I'm turned around. My best escape is everywhere I run I feel that you run me down.
After I came quietly from the shade of doubt I lay amidst the sycamores spacing out; The ravens in their reckoning stared me down. I tried to confide in my sensitive side but he wasn't around. I tried to live by temperance but I came out flat. You tried to give forgiveness, then you took it back. I loaded up on tragedies for the ones I lacked. I gathered my clues in the avenues, all faded to black. I'd be the most pitiful way to go Where I sleep at your door in a rent-a-suit With rain on my face; You can't take me back where I belong. I told you I'd love you, well, I guess I tried. I gave you my shoulder when I made you cry. I overlooked the foliage to the vacant skies. I'd said I'd be true; it was then that I knew I must have lied. Now all my new beginnings are the past explained And all my happy endings are semen-stained And all our secret promises are yours to break. I pass like a creep, and skulk off to sleep in the Mess that I've made. I'd be the most pitiful way to go Where I sleep at your door in a rent-a-suit With rain on my face; Won't you can't take me back where I belong.
Walked on hot streets Through all that concrete sprawl. We had conversations I know I'll never recall. I see the years I've lost Finding nature in a vacant lot, Smoking cigarettes at the truck stop. Morning breaks and casts Shards of cloud above the overpass Near the house where I saw you last. Stepped down. Cheeks sunken. See the years have been dragging you down Since you, half-drunken, let fall that Rippling gown; And the baby at your breast; It wasn't me who brought her into this mess. See your eyes bespeak my heartlessness. I know I should concede That I'm lonelier than I thought I'd be; That I am misgivings mostly. I see the years I've lost When I find what you were is what your not. In your eyes I see what I haven't got. Evening comes and weighs With the memories I've buried away Near the house where I hoped you'd stay.
In the photo frame Undeniably you Next to some figure who looks like me. In the south of Araby– Subterranean towns– Seeing myself in all those places I'd love to see. We're up against the winter garden gate Where the sun sets in your hair. If you look past the smile you can sun, honey, I'm not there. In early hours I awaken alone– Fall to remembering all the moments that I left behind. No matter where I will always return To the residence in the squalor of my own mind– Walking down some broken-bottle beach Where the gold salt fills the air. If you see me staring at the surf You'll know that I'm not there. You said I'd wake and you'd be gone And I wouldn't know where I went wrong. You made some cynical remark And I pretended not to care. I can't tell the future but I know that Maybe I'm not there.
Found them on blue-painted hills; Those unifying words that I knew If spoken would never be heard, So I buried them there. Scribbled in black books Distortions of that phrase; In your eyes I saw they meant nothing at all And they faded away. Pillars of wintery light Dissolve into the lake and the day Slips into wandering night And I'm fading away. Dabbled in black verse A raven on my chest where I lie A fool and a liar at best; And I wake again. If you see me in this trance again, Whenever I look back again I can't look away Cause I'm holding out for memory– Something to remind me of the things that I'd say.


released March 25, 2015

Jon Hughes: guitars, bass, piano/organs, violin, lap steel, melodica, percussion
Paul Hannon: drums

All songs written and arranged by Jon Hughes.
Drums recorded at Claycastle Recording Studios.
All songs mixed at Claycastle Recording Studios by John Burke.
All songs mastered at WAV Mastering by Richard Dowling.


all rights reserved



Jon Hughes Ireland

American songwriter and multi-instrumentalist, Jon Hughes, has been based in Ireland since 2005. He has shared a stage with Damien Jurado, She Keeps Bees, and the legendary singer-songwriter, Buddy Mondlock.

Hughes' latest collection of songs, "Sunshine Remorse", was released in January of 2019.
... more

contact / help

Contact Jon Hughes

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account